Gloria Steinem said it best when she said “Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don’t feel like I should be doing something else.” To write means more than putting pretty words on a page. The act of writing is to share a part of your soul with the world. Writing is a way to escape reality; a way to let your emotions flow freely from your mind.
Writing is an art. Words in a dictionary are innocent and powerless but when put in the hands of a good writer, someone who knows how to combine them, they become beautiful and tragic. Good and evil. They touch our hearts and stimulate philosophical thinking.
Writing is a form of self-discovery and a path to self-actualization. Unless you meditate daily, there is a good chance you still haven’t figured out who you are at your very core. When we write, we write from our heart. Even if we are doing it subconsciously, we are writing about our thoughts, our values, our beliefs, our fears, our inspirations, our desires, contributions to our happiness, and contributions to our sadness, all of which are the essence of who we truly are.
Writers are very complex individuals. They are not afraid to feel things. They are not afraid to capture raw emotions and turn them into beautifully worded sentences. They live in their own little world. Their own strange fantasy world filled with unrealistic expectations. A world they create themselves. A world in which their imagination is free to roam wherever their heart desires. A world they get lost in; a world that is filled with desire and temptation. They often times have trouble escaping this world, for it is much more appealing than the real world.
Writers are almost impossible to understand. They don’t even understand themselves. They are strange creatures. Famed poet Edgar Allan Poe said they are certifiably insane. That’s not degrading to a writer though. Some of the most intelligent and talented people were insane: Greek mathematician Pythagoras (yes, the one who introduced the Pythagorean Theorem that we all learned in school), Michelangelo, Mozart, Beethoven, Bach, Einstein, and the list goes on.
Writers are forgetful but they remember everything. They forget appointments and anniversaries but remember what you wore and how you smelled on your first date. They remember every story you have told them, like ever, but forget what you just said. They don’t remember to water the plants or take out the trash, but they don’t forget how to make you laugh. Writers are forgetful because they are busy remembering the important things.
It is not an easy task to love a writer. It takes patience and understanding. It takes compassion and determination. They are fragile yet strong. They are confused yet intelligent. They are disorganized yet composed. They are alluring and elusive; romantic and witty.
Be prepared for them to leave you. There will be moments when their mind is somewhere completely outside the realm of reality. Whether you are in the middle of a conversation or sitting in silence, you can see it in their eyes that you have lost them. A writer is always working. When they are looking out the window they are working. Sometimes they hear a song and a certain lyric hits them just right. When this happens, they are not ignoring you. They are thinking of ways to incorporate what they have just seen or heard, into their writing. They are thinking of the perfect way to word the scenario. Let them be. Give them the time they need and then they will come back to you with their full attention.
Being late will be a common occurrence for them. Writing comes with many challenges including writer’s block. Every writer knows the frustration of this. Because of this, every writer knows that when ideas are flowing, it is best not to stop writing. They will also be late because ideas come at the most random moments. Sometimes they will be driving down the road and have to pull over to jot down an idea that they just concocted. Or sometimes to re-write something they have already written just one more time. Don’t worry though; they will eventually arrive at their destination.
Late nights will also be something you should get used to. Writers often stay up until the early morning hours because that is when they do their best writing. Psychological studies have shown that we are most creative late at night. In fact, Mark Twain once said, “You never have to change anything you get up in the middle of the night to write.”
And you will inevitably show up in their writing. If you are dating a writer and they don’t write about you, they don’t love you. Whether it is something good or something bad, you will be there, in their notebooks, in their computer, on gum wrappers, on crumpled up pieces of paper. You will be there because you will be their biggest inspiration; you will be the reason there is something for them to write about. You will be immortal. They will capture you in the little moments when you’re singing along with the radio, or when you are walking in the rain and the raindrops are dripping off your chin, or the way you looked at them right before the last time you kissed. They’ll use metaphors, inside jokes, and anything they can to include you in their work.
Most importantly, if you love a writer, be prepared to read their writings. They want your opinion. They want your approval because they love you and value your opinion. But more than anything, they want you to read it because that is their way of including you in their own little world.
Hemingway once said, “How simple the writing of literature would be if it were only necessary to write in another way what has been well written. It is because we have had such great writers in the past that a writer is driven far out past where he can go.”
I’m not a great writer; Earnest Hemingway was a great writer. I’m just a girl writing her novel one chapter at a time.